Wednesday 10 October 2018

Stepping Out Challenge - Day 10 - Carers Story Continued





Welcome to today's post, I am taking part in a 31 day blog challenge where I post everyday in October.  I love creating challenges for myself and joining ones by others.  My challenge for the rest of the month is to reflect on some of the series I created for myself and inspiration that I have taken away.

Listen to the Podcast


Today I am going to be continuing with the A - Z of Dementia - a Carers Story


Thank you so much for joining me again.  As I started to share my story I began to think about all the negative emotions I felt around the dementia.  I wanted to relate to mum as her child her daughter and not her carer.

I felt lost - I didn't know what I should be doing every step of the way, some days I made it up, some I played it by ear or just shut down and moved on automatic.  I felt angry - why us, we had lost our father from an unknown illness, the doctor we had should have been disbarred for his handling of Dad's illness and every time I saw him (cause mum didn't want to change - a loyalty to authority that her generation had) I wanted to give him a slap for his condescending attitude.

As my father slipped away, my brother turned to me and said that we had to be strong for mum.  The tears that were beginning to stream down my face did an about turn, part of me couldn't compute, I put away the voice that said 'who is going to be strong for me and mentally began to construct a strategy of care that when mum was in the throws of Dementia came into action.  I thus went into stealth mode and became organised and planned and took responsibility and created schedules for us as a family.



I didn't think about myself, I was on lock down I shut out my emotions to stop the floodgates from opening as if they did I couldn't be effective.  I compartmentalized my emotions and tapped into them only when caught off guard - such as someone asking how I was.

Over time I built a fortress around my emotions and you needed special clearance to cross the moat which guarded how I felt.  I became practical and rather than thinking about how I felt, I started to consider how mum might have felt.  If I felt scared, how must mum feel?

I felt frustration and fear - we have all felt these, but what if your frustrations are dismissed, and you were told to sit down and the more you tried to explain yourself the more frustrated you got cause they weren't listening to you, they didn't and wouldn't understand, they ignore you, shout at you.  In my work with people living with dementia, I have seen this happen first hand.



How would you feel if it were you?  I began to look at all the emotions I felt around the dementia and the feeling of powerlessness and tried to understand how my mum and others might feel.  Mum was able to cloak the memory loss for some time especially to the health professionals which often made us look like we were the ones who had memory issues.  She worked hard to enjoy the life she was living and she became the life and soul of not only the party but where ever she went she brought laughter and an appreciation for life and she brought me along for the ride - she called herself the dancing queen.  I laughed, cried, came out of my own comfort zone, accepted she was willing to live her life and found a way to make sense of mine.

Yes, it is good to share, to understand to realize we are but here for a moment.  I don't mourn for the loss of who mum once was, she is still living and breathing and wanting to make the most of her life.  We have to think about what it is we call quality of life for ourselves and spend time enjoying it with our loved ones, we need to have patience.

In our fast paced lives, we have to think about what really matters to us, we are all getting older and have to think about the kind of life we want to lead, how we treat each other and how we want to be treated.

You an check out some more of the posts I wrote HERE and if you have any questions please do not hesitate to leave them.  I am so glad you were able to join me today.

If you are interested in the Arts and Health activities you can join my  Arts in Health Network where I curate Arts and Health activities happening around the world, you can also share what you are doing as well.


Tomorrow I will be going further into the Tips for Carers challenge with some practical things that you can do.  I hope during this month you find some time to get out of your comfort zone and challenge, be creative and stretch yourself.

    Why not join me each day for the rest of October as we dive into to some exciting challenges and look at ways in which they can impact on your own life. 

    I look forward to seeing you tomorrow, it is never too late to start! The main thing is to take one step at a time and do something that you find interesting.

    Stay blessed and be a blessing.
    Ps: some resources that you can check out
    Posted by Amanda Trought at 18:07
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    Tuesday 9 October 2018

    Stepping Out Challenge - Day 9 - Dementia A Carers Story





    Welcome to today's post, I am taking part in a 31 day blog challenge where I post everyday in October.  I love creating challenges for myself and joining ones by others.  My challenge for the rest of the month is to reflect on some of the series I created for myself and inspiration that I have taken away.

    Listen to the Podcast


    Today I am going to be talking about Dementia and being a Carer.  I did a series called A - Z of Dementia - A Carers Story




    It is funny talking about a challenge within a challenge, but the A-Z Challenge that I did in 2012 was probably the first time I really thought about my situation as a carer and what it meant to me seeing my mother living with Dementia.  I never thought about myself in the midst of it or considered how I felt, but knew I had a job to do and so set to doing it the best way I knew how.

    A is for Alzheimer’s, 

    There was no emotional manual, the dementia caught us off guard, there was no calling card and preparation, but one day things just seemed different, mum acting weird, not glaringly but saying things that made us wonder briefly, but we never twigged, just brushed it off not daring to thing that there may be something wrong.

    B is for Behaviour, 

    I remember going up to her local chemist to buy something for mum and the pharmacist handed me a shopping bag that mum had forgotten in there Friday, it was now Tuesday and I looked into the bag I could see among the shopping a pint of milk that had now curdled.  I wondered why he didn't put the milk in the fridge or even get in contact as they had her address.

    C is for Carer, 

    In hindsight there were many people on the periphery who noted things, saw things that we were too close to see and never alerted the family and just watched things unfold as if watching a reality tv show and we were the unknowing participants.

    D is for Dependant,

    It was hard to deal with.  My son was around 5 at the time and when we would visit mum would say she wanted us to stay - she lived on her own, I didn't want leave her to but had to do the school run and go to work, I prayed that what ever was happening would just go away and mum would be safe.  But it didn't go away and I started staying with her as she couldn't be left on her own.  Mum lived about 45 minutes away from me.   I think I felt several things, responsible and annoyed, part of me didn't want to take on the carers role.  There were many inner casualties over the years as I tried to navigate being a carer and holding on to me.

    E is for Enough, 

    I began writing and it was an outlet for me, I had so much to say about things that I learnt that it was good to get things down on paper and begin to process.  What ever your situation is it is so important to find others that you can share your story with, as the inner stresses can lead to outward physical symptoms.

    F is for Fear, 

    Doing the A - Z challenge help me put things down that I thought not only helped me but could help others as well not just in my local area but from around the world I spoke to people who were in similar situations.

    G is for Guilt

    Check out some of the posts and think about your own story and experience, how can you share it and be a blessing to others who may learn something from what you share.

    H is for Health Professionals, 

    I will continue sharing tomorrow, and would love you to come back and spend some time.

    I is forIdentity,

    Are you or have you been a carer? What has your experience been like?  Are you the sort who will ask for help or do you do it all yourself?  We cannot carry the weight of the world ourselves and sometimes in your stepping out you have to ask for the help that you need. 

    J is for Judgement

    Tomorrow I will share the second part from my carers story.  I hope during this month you find some time to challenge the way you currently do things, be creative and stretch yourself.

      Why not join me each day for the rest of October as we dive into to some exciting challenges and look at ways in which they can impact on your own life. 

      I look forward to seeing you tomorrow, it is never too late to start! The main thing is to take one step at a time and do something that you find interesting.

      Stay blessed and be a blessing.
      Ps:  There are some resources and links below I will be sharing more books that might be able to help.:






      Posted by Amanda Trought at 18:55
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      Monday 8 October 2018

      Stepping Out Challenge - Day 8 - Art Journal Teaching





      Welcome to today's post, I am taking part in a 31 day blog challenge where I post everyday in October.  I love creating challenges for myself and joining ones by others.  My challenge for the rest of the month is to reflect on some of the series I created for myself and inspiration that I have taken away.

      Listen to the Podcast


      Today I am going to be finishing off talking about Art Journals, there is so much more to say, check out some of the Art Journals that were created as part of the series.
       31 Art Journals  




      So yesterday I shared with you about how I got started art journalling, and examples of the videos on the series.  It is so fulfilling creating an art journal from scratch, and you can make it to your own specifications.  I have art journals of every size and one of my favorite sizes are B6, it is a bit wider than A5, can fit in the average size bag and I find them handy to carry around.  I also created some really small ones that I call Capturing Moments Journals, these are a no sew mini journal that again is easy to put in the bag and capture snippets of inspiration, drawings or anything that you want to take note of.


      One of the other things that I was able to do while art journaling is to teach.  The more I put in, the more I was able to give and I love sharing techniques and my 'Ah ha' moments.

      Some people are in a place where they are just finding their style and need encouragement to keep going and over time they find the kind of art they like to produce.  I also find that some want to take away techniques that they can apply to what they already know, some will run with it or leave it, but it is all part of growing and finding your style as an artist.


      I started teaching online in 2015 - one of my first teaching courses was My Color is Beautiful Art it was great to have been selected alongside so many inspiring artists, and though nervous I stepped up to the challenge and said yes, and haven't looked back since.  

      And I kept going over the years, learning techniques, finding inspiration from other artists, there is still so much to learn, techniques and materials to try and each year teaching and getting involved with developing courses and creating content for Art Journal Lessons.

      I am teaching here!

      BadAss Art Journal hosted by Tiare Smith, is one of my most recent classes that I have taught on and have been involved over the past 3 years.  The 2018, the sessions are still available as a self directed course until the end of the year.



      BadAss 2016

      One Badass Art Journal


      I was a guest Artist for Embrace Your Art, there were weekly sessions and it was great fun!
      Every Friday! - Its FREE


      Hacking the Color Wheel 
      hosted by Kiala Givehand, my class looked at getting inspiration from the colors around us.




      The Journey Within 2016 
      I taught 4 sessions in this Year long class.

      The Journey Within 2016 - A Year Long Adventure


      My own Art Journalling Products

      Art Journal Series 1 Bundle Series is something that I recently came up with.  I am often asked how to come up with backgrounds and so I put a selection together, it comes with:
      • 5 background videos looking at how to create your own, build your stash, and to create images from your backgrounds, 
      • 4 Art Journals for you to make made from recycled materials
      • 31 Art Journal prompts for you to spend time in your Art Journal
      • 5 Art Journal Backgrounds for you to download and keep, and 5 Art Journal Videos for you to keep

      Art Journal Bundle - Series 1
      Buy Now for $10


      25 Ways to fit Art and Creativity into Your Life 



      Free gift when you sign up to my Mailing list


      I have had some amazing experiences working with art journals and teaching, when I look back to where I started I realize just how far you have come.  I never would have thought that I would be teaching or creating my own art journal tools and it has taken discipline and perseverance and a joy for experimenting and playing.

      Tomorrow I will be changing the topic to something that is close to my heart and is the Dementia Carers Stories that I did on the blog.  I hope during this month you find some time to challenge, be creative and stretch yourself.  

        Why not join me each day for the rest of October as we dive into to some exciting challenges and look at ways in which they can impact on your own life. 

        I look forward to seeing you tomorrow, it is never too late to start!  There are many things that I learnt on my journey as a carer and I hope that you find some useful information for someone you know who is looking after a loved one. The main thing in any challenge is to take one step at a time and do something that you find interesting and inspiring.

        Stay blessed and be a blessing.
        Ps:  If you are on a budget and would like to check out some gardening supplies/books at a discounted price, check out one of the links below:

        Posted by Amanda Trought at 18:55
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        Sunday 7 October 2018

        Stepping Out Challenge - Day 7 - Creating Art Journals





        Welcome to today's post, I am taking part in a 31 day blog challenge where I post everyday in October.  I love creating challenges for myself and joining ones by others.  My challenge for the rest of the month is to reflect on some of the series I created for myself and inspiration that I have taken away.

        Listen to the Podcast





        Today I am sharing about the 31 Art Journal challenge that I did by the same name in which I share 31 different Art Journals that I had made or altered, over a period of time.

        I have been creating for as long as I can remember, and embarked on Art Journaling for around 14 years.

        I was trying to find my particular style and wasn't sure how or where to find it but found that working in an art journal allowed me to experiment.  I created small pieces and built up my confidence.  I would use my art journal in the same way as my written journal.  I would create pieces that spoke to me and told my story, not necessary for others to see but to enable me to express myself visually.

        Journals enabling you to combine art and encouraging words

        At one point I did try to combine my written journal and my art journal but for me both fulfill a necessary function on their own and use both, and more recently I have been putting journaling on my art journal pages.


        Over the years of taking many course I became confident with making my own art journals and also re-purposing.  I used to buy them but found when you make them or altered them yourself it added to the uniqueness and has an integral part to the stories that the particular art journal held.


        Collage Journal

        As time has gone and playing about with my own style I have my own way of doing things.  I create a lot of Art Journals from recycled materials and it is wonderful to see what would normally be thrown out be transformed into a thing of beauty, combining collage, and mixed media supplies

        Creating the 31 Art Journal Challenge enabled me to see just how many art journals I had created - the time put into each and there are a lot more than 31 now.

        Soul Restoration Journal

        I encourage you to try making a journal of your own out of the supplies that are currently available to you, try making different sizes and see which one works with you best and let me know how you get on!

        Tomorrow I will share the second part from my 31 Art Journal Series, which also looks at some of the courses that I have taught on.  I hope during this month you find some time to challenge, be creative and stretch yourself.
          John Lewis Journal

          Why not join me each day for the rest of October as we dive into to some exciting challenges and look at ways in which they can impact on your own life. 

          I look forward to seeing you tomorrow, it is never too late to start! The main thing is to take one step at a time and do something that you find interesting.

          Stay blessed and be a blessing.
          Ps: Check out some books and art supplies in the links  below:  
          Posted by Amanda Trought at 18:46
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          Saturday 6 October 2018

          Stepping Out Challenge - Day 6 - Getting the most from your Garden





          Welcome to today's post, I am taking part in a 31 day blog challenge where I post everyday in October.  I love creating challenges for myself and joining ones by others.  My challenge for the rest of the month is to reflect on some of the series I created for myself and inspiration that I have taken away.

          Listen to the Podcast


          Today I am going to continue with the second part of the series I did on my Gardening Channel called 31 Plants in my Tropical Garden  



          Gardening can have it's challenges, ups and downs but it is also extremely rewarding.  I have spoken on the previous post about the joys of growing your own.  I get a real buzz from being able to go and pick some herbs for cooking or fruits and vegetables for a smoothie or salad, and I am increasing the plants that I am growing all the time.

           One of the things that the garden has taught me is the need for patience, at times it felt as if I was checking on the seeds that I had planted every day, expecting growth and nothing would happen, like with my Basil and Coriander seeds.  Then at other times it would seem as if plants just grew over night when I wasn't watching such as with my Mexican Sunflower plants.  Patience also taught me that just because you want to do a particular job in the garden, doesn't mean that it is going to get done and some jobs take a lot longer that you might have originally thought.

          I have learnt how to adjust my soil and deal with sloping land and also had to learn not only how the weather will effect the plants but I had to spend the first 6 - 8 months understanding how the lay of the land and what would work in regards to the type of plants that would thrive in particular places.



          The space that I was growing on had quite a large slope, I didn't have money to bring in additional soil to balance it out and so I had to figure out how best on a budget to stop the soil from washing away during the heavy rains, and during the dryer season deal with the cracks in the heavy clay soil.  It has definitely been a challenge, but I am glad I persist and take it as it comes. I ultimately want the land to work for me and look at the examples found in nature.

          As an artist I have been very excited to find plants that can be used in a creative way, either as fibers or as natural dyes and I have found a number of plants that can be used in the Art Studio - such as the Clitoria Ternatea, Clammy Cherry, Banana leaf, Mahogany and other trees around the garden, and some of the leaves create natural dyes.


          I have been adding to the 31 Plants growing in my Tropical Garden over time and I think that I probably have double the amount of plants growing in my space. These are many  different plants that I have been able to successfully grown from seed or friends have given me cuttings or small plants.  I was recently given a Tamarind Plant and Sour Sop plant and then the Sour Sop seeds that I planted amazingly started to grow, and I popped about 20 seeds into the tray.  I am hoping for a tasty harvest.

          I feel very fortunate to be able to spend time in the garden and grow all the plants that I have always dreamed of growing, it is such a blessing and it is great to share the information on my Gardening YouTube channel.

          I am transforming the landscape and creating a haven and it is definitely one of the coolest things that I have been able to do and I would love you to join me on the adventure.



          If 'growing your own' is something that you would like to do then I encourage you to think about how you can use the space you have to grow something whatever size.  It is a therapeutic activity, even weeding can sooth away the stress and there is much to learn as you gain more confidence.

          Here are the tips again If you are on a budget and want to start growing your own:

          • Why don't you start with growing some of the seeds that come from the fruit or vegetables that you eat, 
          • Sprouting pulses is another quick way to start growing
          • Many of the seeds that you can purchase are quite economical and you can start quite quickly.
          • Check out your local Pound Store/Dollar Store they usually have a garden section and you can pick up some supplies for cheap.  


          Keep an eye on my Gardening Channel - for those who want to grow and garden on a tight budget I will be sharing some hints and tips so please subscribe and click the notification bell so you know when a new video has been uploaded.  I currently post 2 or 3 new videos every week.



          Have you had anymore thoughts on what your approach needs to be to your green space?  
          Check out some of the resources, you only need a pot and some soil to start growing. If you don't have outdoor space you should get some pot plants that come in all sizes.  Most of the indoor plants that grow in a colder climate are found outdoors in the Caribbean and with the right care can thrive with no problems in your home. 

          Tomorrow I will share the what I have been doing with my Art Journal Series.  I hope during this month you find some time to challenge, be creative and stretch yourself.

            Why not join me each day for the rest of October as we dive into to some exciting challenges and look at ways in which they can impact on your own life. 

            I look forward to seeing you tomorrow, it is never too late to start! The main thing is to take one step at a time and do something that you find interesting.

            Stay blessed and be a blessing.
            Ps:  If you are on a budget and would like to check out some gardening supplies/books at a discounted price, check out one of the links below:
            Posted by Amanda Trought at 06:30
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