Being More Mindful - You can make a change

mind·ful·ness

• 1.the quality or state of being conscious or aware of something:"their mindfulness of the wider cinematic tradition"
• 2.a mental state achieved by focusing one's awareness on the present moment, while calmly acknowledging and accepting one's feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations, used as a therapeutic technique.

I see Me - Mixed media Art Journal Page - Amanda Trought

It is funny how the simple small things we do can get us taking action, and I had reached what felt like a slump - I knew what I wanted to do, but couldn't seem to move myself into taking action.  The feeling seem to linger and no matter what I tried nothing seem to work long term.

It only takes a slice of cake

After eating a slice of fruit cake one evening, I was met with the usual feelings of aching joints and lethargy which quickly followed by irritated skin.  I vowed not to eat anymore cake, I was done!  I thought of the pain I was feeling and I didn't want to feel it anymore, I wanted to finally take my decisions and life into my own hands.  My family looked at me with amusement as they had heard it all before, they said they would believe it when the see it, but this felt different.  I went further and told my son that if he were to see me eating cake he should rip it out of my hands, and then after thinking about how messy it would be I offered to pay him. My husband decided that he wanted to get in on what he saw as free money and they both rubbed their hands with glee mentally calculating how much they would make off me as I succumbed to the cake.  

I listened to their voices telling me that I couldn't do it and made a decision that I was going to do it, this time would be different!

Making the decision

They laughed and joked about it, but the way I was feeling I felt for sure that I would stick to it.  The more and more I thought about it I felt if I could give up cake then there were other habits that I wanted to address, it was more than just about the cake, and I was up for this challenge!  

After thinking about it for a while I realized that by paying them I was putting the responsibility of not eating cake onto them catching me.  Rather than punish myself for doing wrong I needed to celebrate looking after my body and getting on with the things I wanted to do.  I reasoned that if I really wanted to give up cake then I could, equally whatever other changes that I wanted to make I could put these in place as well.  It all had to do with a mindset change that I needed to just go for it!

Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage - Anais Nin

Flipping the switch

A switch flipped and I immediately felt different about how I wanted to treat myself.  If I could change my mind about eating things that were physically affecting me then what else could I do.  I decided that I needed to really look after 'me' rather than just talking about it, but I also had to support myself by gaining wisdom from others who had achieved their goals, and also create a little cheer leading team for myself. 

Wisdom is like the baobab tree; no one individual can embrace it ...

When you are not feeling yourself other things are impacted as well, my creativity suffered the ideas that I would normally work on in my studio couldn't find me as I was dulled by inactivity and I really didn't feel like getting on with the very things that made me feel good or needed to get done.  

As I thought of all these things I knew that change and taking care of myself meant that I needed to really see who I was, wanted to be, do, and all the rest of it.

I SEE ME - Mixed media art

So my mindful acts are a way of getting to know myself, what I want to do, spend time doing the things that nurture and encourage, and included the following:

• Daily morning walks
• Getting to bed by 11.30pm - or as close to
• Daily reading 15 mins minimum
• Improve Diet -Wheat and dairy free diet, lots of fruit and veg and whole foods, no processed foods
• Daily Art & Journal writing
• Listening to motivational and inspiring daily recordings
• Daily family time
• End of day review and scheduling work and goals 

All of these things on the list are to get me kick started to change, and to achieve the things that I have been saying I don't have time for, and get me back to the me that I wanted.  When I focus on these things I am reminding myself that I do matter, that showing up for myself reaffirms my own value.

Problems are only opportunities with thorns on them - Hugh Miller

Making a Commitment

When I am feeling tired I remind myself that I made a commitment and that seems to propel me into action, I get my walking gear and within minutes I am out the door.  I have been constantly reminding myself that each action is about showing up for me, and the time is much better spent.  Even reading and committing to doing some reading every day means all the books that I have promising to read I can make time for them now because they are part of my schedule.

Every day that passes I am being shown new insights and ideas and I am learning to value the time that I do have and make the most of the things that I want to do, and celebrating my achievements!  We are all given the same amount of time it depends how we use it, and the value that we place on on our lives.  There is no replay button or do over, so we need to be getting on with these things today!

Walking in your blessings.....

I would love to hear about any changes that you have decided to make in your day to day activities, 

What is it that you have always wanted to do but convinced yourself that you don't have time?

What ways are you going to nurture yourself today?

Dwelling in the desert and images - I just felt like writing....

I felt like writing a piece, it is called 'Dwelling in the Desert'.  I would like to write more often, and plan to try and make a practice of it. I have included some of my past art work, I hope you like it, leave me a comment let me know what you think, if you resonate with the piece.

Dwelling in the Desert

How is it that thoughts can take hold of you - from just a few words your world can be turned upside down.

Mixed media art - Amanda Trought

The attentiveness wrapped in tender words is what did it in the guise of a stream.  It is now understandable that when you get stuck in the desert for so long, in a parched and dry land where everything seems withered you loose a piece of yourself, ever so slowly until you look in the mirror and don't even recognize your reflection.  Every now and then in what seems like a cycle a stream appears.  You've been parched for so long you wonder if you should drink, laugh, wet your feet or totally ignore it, but the very idea of the stream brings hope.

Mixed media art - Amanda Trought

Every time you look at the stream it reminds you of those unfulfilled dreams, and you are amazed at how you got into the position.  You never thought that you would be surrounded by dry land in the desert for so long and just got used to it, the days rolled weeks, months and then the years and then you looked back and things had changed, you had changed and you were just there.  Your throat aches from crying and calling out "Why".

Mixed media art - Amanda Trought

Now the sound of the stream as it bubbles over the rocks, caressing the tips of the trees that suddenly gather along its path.  It brings new life, fresh eyes, new ways of thinking and as quickly as the stream appears there is a refreshing to your soul and you are lost in your confusion, feeling guilty, wanting to dip in the stream, and lose yourself, scared that it is only a disguise and the thirst will still remain.

Mixed media art - Amanda Trought

You didn't realize that you were thirsty until you noticed the stream.  Some say that if you drink from the stream you will never be able to go back, some say a new life awaits.  As you walked along the stream bed, it looks so inviting, enticing, you long to laugh again and feel at ease.  Flowing over the rocks droplets of water rise up and touches your face, absorbed in your skin your senses are heightened as you are reminded of where and who you are.

Mixed media art - Amanda Trought

Confusion now spills into your mind, your heart beating fast.

Stop talking, let there be silence you say, your thoughts needing to be quiet, banishing them to the barren part of your mind so that you can be still, you want your thoughts to be ordered to stop what seems like madness, or is it just your mind playing tricks of yearning from another dimension.

You wait, confusion tries to come back from the banished regions of your mind to taunt you again and you are tempted to get closer to the stream, perhaps you'll just gaze for a while.  You tell yourself that your perspective has changed, and that you'll be stronger, and if you look through squinted eyes perhaps the desert isn't so bad, the years still passing and you can see that the desert has a different cloud formation going on, perhaps there is change ahead, perhaps it isn't enough!