Longing - Creating in Faith

Welcome to Creating in Faith.  I am now sharing these posts on my podcast with additional insights and you can listen to the podcast below.  There are also some great comments that were made on the original post which also adds some insight to the topic and may be able to bless you.

There are many things if we think about them carefully that we long for.  Some are to make us feel better within ourselves, some for the benefit of other people.  I have come to know and experienced the longing that stirs deep within and that feels like it cannot be remedied - found hand in hand with loss.

 

In my younger days I had many desires, I would have been convinced that some of which I could not live without, and thinking about them now see them as trivial and unimportant. My maturity makes sense of the world and understands how views, and desires change, and in my youth often with the wind.

My thoughts on longing are around the loss of a loved ones - a child, father, best friend and more recently brother.  You wonder how much your heart can take, never for one minute thinking that you will have to bear the callouses of yet another loss.  My longing is wrapped up in wanting to see them again, to say those words that never got said, to feel their presence one more time, to stop for a moment the ache, that dull ache which rests deep within.  There are momentary distractions and life feels like normal, you can breath again and sometimes laugh.  Then you remember, something missing, something you took for granted that it would always be there but you realise a hole remains.  Is it a round peg or a square, whatever shape it is it feels as if there is nothing that can fill it. 

Time they say is a healer it gets better.  I can say that I still wonder what my son Cairo who would be turning 24 this year would be accomplishing and what adventures he would have got up to.  My dad would have been in his 80's there was still so much wisdom untapped and how he would have had so much fun with his grandchildren.  Barbara spurred me on in my journey as an artist we shared much laughter and supported each other, and now my Brother Robert.  I think of him constantly wondering how I can use my creativity to take away the ache, knowing that he would expect me to do all the things I shared with him from my hopes and dreams.  

The longing doesn't go away I guess my you find different ways to respond, and my creativity allows me to say those things I still want to say, and when I don't know what or how I should feel I just stay still and listen.

My faith helps me to put one foot in front of the other taking one day, one thought, one step at a time.  My creativity is helping me to say those things that I need to say whether it is a painting, piece of writing, poetry or something that I have created.  They go hand in hand bridging the gap between the words unsaid, mutterings and groans from the heart, laughter and tears on the opposite sides of the same coin and the understanding that has come over time.

There will always be a longing, we can't hide or pretend.  Some days it will be easier, and others not so easy.  We learn to embrace, to share the memories, to talk about our loved ones as if they are in the next room.  We remember them the good and bad times, the tests and the triumphs and we keep taking those steps reminded of the fragility and remembering to laugh....

Do some work in your art journal and see what areas you want to focus on and express either through colour, words, song, photographs and more.

Stay blessed and be a blessing.

Realityarts Podcast - Episode 67 - Family OUT NOW!

Today on the podcast I talk about Family and what it means to me, both the immediate and extended.  I also touch on those people who you spark from and feel sometimes on first meeting as if you have known them for a long time.  

Coming Home - Mixed Media Art Page

Take out your journal and create a page about what your family means to you, what memories of your family do you have, and experiences that you want to hold on to and pass down to younger generations.

Join me on the podcast, you can also listen on your favorite platform and find me on there as well, I am looking forward to connecting with you

If you listen to podcasts on different platforms check below and see if yours is listed and you will be able to enjoy my podcast from there, take your pick!

Anchor 

Google  Podcasts

Spotify

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Castbox

Pocket  Casts

RadioPublic

Overcast     

Stitcher 

Apple Podcasts

Stay blessed and be a blessing

Saving Yourself - When you feel like your disappearing

Saving Yourself When you feel like your disappearing addresses the need for us to make sure we think about our own health and well-being on a daily basis.

Have you ever found yourself doubting your own feelings and emotions, or that your feelings didn’t matter? Do you even know how you feel right now?  You sometimes hear people talk about how you should be feeling based on their own needs, but they never really ask you, and never seem to have the time to listen to what you might have to say.

It is easy to feel as if 'you' don't matter, you’re not used to shining the light on yourself and you really don't want to make a fuss when people don't acknowledge just how much you have done for them.

Lots of us go through this problem, we've spent years caring for others, whether it is our children, someone else’s children or we've cared for an elderly relative.  We often find it difficult to think of what it is that we do like and it seems as if we have slowly eroded who we thought we were.  Often not being able to answer the question 'what is your favorite......?'

I can totally relate as I found that when I was caring for my mother with dementia and when my son was little I often felt that I didn't know who I was any more.  I spent the majority of my time trying to cater for the needs of another that I didn't know what I wanted, or how I felt and it has been a long journey to rediscover the 'me' I know I can be.

I found that when I didn't have some 'me' time whether it was 5 minutes or 2 hours, this was when I was more likely to feel undervalued emotionally drained and stuck just longing to be rescued somehow!

The easiest way to ensure that this feeling of stuck-ness doesn't happen is finding that much needed time, even if it is 5 minutes you need to schedule it and put it in your diary.  Let others know that you are taking the time, set your watch and go do something creative.

I have 5 easy things that you can incorporate into your day you can do all 5 or just one and this will help you fit creativity into your day and jump start your creativity

1.  Write down your ideas, you know you have them.  Find yourself a set of index cards, or write in a journal and list them, things that you might want to do, try out, go see.  When you start writing things down it helps take you to the next step of putting them into action.  Dust out those corners of your mind and see how many you can come up with in 10 minutes – you can give yourself 10 minutes right?

2.  Identify all the things that you can do in a short space of time say 5 minutes for you, list them, and these are the things that you will take the time out to do when you have shorter pockets of time to spend on yourself.

3.  Take your time – whenever you schedule time for yourself focus on what it is that you are doing, don’t try and do a whole range of things, value you in that space at that moment and really enjoy spending time on you!

4.  Where can you go for inspiration?  Think of places you can go, it could initially be around your neighbourhood, the local park, a garden, you might be able to incorporate a once a week trip to a museum, or gallery.

5.  Try something new! Think about the art supplies that you have and try something different, you might use them in a different way, or try a new technique, just allow yourself to play.

Once you start giving yourself this much needed time you will find that you’re not so stressed, and you can breathe again.  You might even be able to hear the birdsong outside your window!

What one do you think you will try first?

If you would like to have more tips and encouragement sign up for my mailing list

Stay blessed and be a blessing

Amanda

Review of 2016 - It is good to see how far you have come!!

I can't quite believe that we are here already and there has been so much happening that I have hardly had time to keep up.  And now we are here again launching ourselves into the new year, new beginnings, fruit, challenges, changes and more.

This month we were visited by relatives from England and the States, and some are still here as we see the new year in.  I thought I would share some of the moments and highlights that made 2016 for me and I hope to fulfill more dreams and be more of a blessing...

Relatives visiting from abroad, great to see them and spend some time

Say 'flying fish', or Barbados

 Friday night fish fry

You can never get tired of this view!

Chilling and making the most of the time

Birthday outing for Josh in Oistins

Out and about in Bridgetown

Teacher on an online Class

Winning Awards at NIFCA Art Exhibition, Barbados

Meeting up with fellow Artist Ron Cumberbatch .... (Phil you are included!)

Trip to Montserrat - Amazing time will share soon 

Fellow conference speakers in Montserrat

The plane ride to Montserrat in a 7 Seater !

Plane ride over Antigua on the way to Montserrat 

 Barbados 50th Independence Celebrations kicked off in Independence square

 Working on New Art Work and sculptures

Made the decision to get a compost bin to really begin to grow my own

Collecting seeds - got quite a collection now!

Planting some beans - growing quite nicely, will be harvesting soon

Did a talk with Kiala Givehand

Open house - Alzheimer's Association - Arts Exhibition

Barbados Alzheimer's Association - 'Remember Me' Conference

National Union of Public Workers, Barbados talk

Spending time with my mum

Picturesque Hideaway in Norbury

There are so many more moments that were special that I haven't yet written about, but I will be sharing during the New Year.

What ever you do to see the old year out and the new year in, stay safe and remember that within you have a multitude of gifts waiting to be birthed, go be a blessing, use your gifts and see what amazing opportunities come back when you take that step!

The Relatives Came - to Barbados!

We had a lovely time when my sister and her family came to stay with us a few months ago and I've been so caught up with different things that it is only now that I can get a chance to share some of that time spent.  Their visit reminded me about the book that I used to read to my son entitled The Relatives Came by Cynthia Rylant  

It is a gorgeous book that tells of a family setting out in their car to visit relatives and spend time with them over the summer, everyone shares the space and makes room for each other.  Cynthia has written quite a lot of children's books and more recently - Little Penguins.

They are both available on Kindle and Hardback and would make lovely gifts for children.

When we were children we would spend time weekend at our cousins, the furthest we went was to visit cousins in Manchester, and I didn't go on a plane until I was 18, unlike now where most children have been on a plane by the time they are 2 years old.  We all look back with fond memories of the times we had and the feeling of not having care in the world.  It is very different now as our kids don't meet up nearly as often and connect more via social media, but you can't beat spending time in person with the folks!

Anyway, my sister and her family came to stay with us and it was great!  We spent time going out and about, relaxing in each others company and laughing.

I indulged over those two weeks. 

 Here is a very delicious yet rich treat I had - Carrot cake at the Waterfront Cafe  it was absolutely delicious, they also do a yummy bread and butter pudding (both of which I shouldn't eat due to the intolerance to wheat and dairy, and I may try to create an alternative on my Raw Foods Fusion Blog).

We walked on the Boardwalk and saw the sun setting.  

You will never get tired watching the sunset, 

and it seems different each time, so beautiful, and we get to enjoy it every day!

We took a drive down to the Crane, again so nice to be by the sea!

Graham Hall Sanctuary was on the list, while the sanctuary part is closed they have a cafe and the grounds are beautifully maintained, and during the afternoon the monkeys move across the lawn to nearby trees 

 It is a lovely place to visit!

Saw the pre cropover celebrations in Broad Street

They had to leave the day of Cropover, though it has changed quite a bit when I first saw it many years ago. I miss the more elaborately designed costumes.

Anyway, they got a taster at least.  One of our final visits took us to the Flower Forest - and I have some amazing photos to share with you.

After the fun and laughter the hugs and the 'see you soon' it was time for them to return to London, the time went so quickly, we tried to value each moment, and continue to remind ourselves that we are not promised tomorrow. Our trip to the UK followed, but I'll share that in another post.

I will also be sharing lots of the images of each visit on my Destination Barbados Blog (under construction at the moment) which is all about my time here, the ups and downs of relocating, there will be lots of imagery as I soak up the beauty of the island......I hope you can join me!