Tuesday, 3 April 2012

D is for Dependant


When I used to think of dependant I never thought anyone other than my son would be dependent on me, and then as they grow up they need you less (or that's the idea!)  Sekani was at an age when he really needed me around when my mother became one of my dependants.  As mum’s condition worsened she wasn’t able to be on her own for extended periods of time and I had to make the hard choice of teaching him to become less dependent on me before he was ready. His response would be 'why do you always have to be the one to stay?' my explanations to him went hand in hand with 'we will do something tomorrow' or at the weekend and would more often than not involve doing things around mums needs.  It meant that we would all have quality time together, I've shed a lot of tears, but I think that he has a better relationship with his Gran-gran for it.  

Her needs have increased, and my son's needs have changed he needs me in a different way now.  While we know that mum cannot look after herself we do pray for miracles and I remind myself of all the times she picked me up when I fell, soothed a worried heart, made my favourite food to cheer me up or get me that 'must have' gift that as a teenager!

I often wonder if she thinks as it in terms of what she cannot do, or finds comfort that she is being treated and loved in the same way she would do if the tables were turned.

7 comments :

  1. Hi Amanda, it's difficult to get that balance between parents and children.

    This is me, Duncan D. Horne, visiting you from the A-Z challenge, wishing you all the best throughout April and beyond.

    Duncan In Kuantan

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  2. Lots of us are sandwiched in between aging parents and parenting our own children. Kudos to you. You've balanced things nicely.
    dreamweaver

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  3. Lots of us are sandwiched in between aging parents and parenting our own children. Kudos to you. You've balanced things nicely.
    dreamweaver

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hey Duncan, thanks for visiting, lovely to meet you.

    Debra, your video is great, thanks for stopping by.

    ReplyDelete
  5. I'm sure being treated with care and consideration does her heart so much good.

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  6. Love the last paragraph. It is a beautiful sentiment.

    I also really love the family photos. :)

    Best of luck with A to Z ... I can see you are doing a fabulous job already.

    Alana @ writercize.blogspot.com

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  7. JL, I think your right, she is always is appreciative for the little things, I have learnt a lot from this.

    Alana, thank you for visiting I love looking at the photos of us as children, would have loved to see my mother as a young girl!

    ReplyDelete

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