Monday 16 April 2012

O is for Opportunities

 Mum on holiday in Portugal

In life stuff happens and we have to look for the opportunities that can present themselves, and these are often disguised under all the rubble and the dust.  There were times during the early stages of mum’s dementia that I really didn’t know what to do and felt lost and alone, I just wanted it all to stop.   I didn’t think that I could get through it, and certainly couldn’t or didn’t feel that I could look forward to anything but increased stress, it is not to say that the stress of it has all disappeared, I have just had to learn to deal with things differently.

The thing that helps me through is to focus on the things that mum can do and celebrating this.  She loves to dance and sing, she became enthusiastic about going out so this calls for new adventures and she is willing to come along.  It is my opportunity to create new memories that we will all be able to look back on and smile, show the grand kids and great grand kids what she was like despite the illness, and for us to enjoy the time we do have with her.

Life’s opportunities don’t always come packaged the way we would like, but very often these are the most memorable ones.

Words so far....

A is for Alzheimer’s, B is for Behaviour, C is for Carer, D is for Dependant, E is for Enough, F is for Fear, G is for Guilt, H is for Health Professionals, I is for Identity, J is for Judgement, K is for Knowledge, L is for Love, M is for Motherhood, N is for Neighbourhood

These posts are part of the A-Z Challenge taking place during the month of April.  I have been sharing about my experience as a carer to a mother with Dementia.  If you would like to know more join the Arts in Health Network and also check out my website for information on some of the work I have done with Creativity and Dementia.


  1. Me too although you found me first. I will make a point of reading the rest of your blogs as I think this is something I may have to deal with myself in the not too distant future.

  2. Karen, things were really tough in the beginning, I am having to find new ways of looking at the situation that will allow me to see the many blessings in the now.

    Jo, praying for you, thank you for passing by. If you can prepare as much as possible it will make the situation easier to deal with.

  3. Amanda, your blog is so beautiful--I am so glad I found your site. I just joined on your GFC but it appears under the name marcia Doyle just so you know it's me.
    Thank you so much for sharing your stories with us!

  4. Celebrating the moment is a great way to rise above this horrible illness. I've always had a hard time living in the present and find myself missing who grandma was and fearing who she will become. It's a concentrated effort to focus on the blessings of the moment - she can still smile and enjoy her great-grandchildren even if she doesn't know who they are.

  5. H Amanda .. you're realising that opportunities do exist .. and I'm sure your art therapy helps hugely for you to understand .. cheers Hilary

  6. Marcia, great to have you here, its a blessing to share with so many supportive people.

    Brianna, even her smile is a blessing. When we try and second guess how it will be we miss the now.

    Hilary, art is really a way to express all those unexpressed emotions.


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