Myeloma Cancer - What can you do?

Happy Birthday Robert Lloyd Trought

Robert, my brother would have been 48 today.  On 2nd June this year it would be 4 years since he passed, I look at the picture and it feels like he was just here.  I never told him enough that I loved, admired and was proud of him.  We can't wait until our loved ones die before or get sick before we tell them how treasured they are.

Robert was loving and encouraging and had 3 gorgeous children and in 2009 he was diagnosed with Multiple Myeloma. He fought the disease for 4 years in the percentage of people where the chemo and other debilitating drugs had little effect, the cancer spread all over his body. 
Surely we thought, a Bone Marrow transplant would help - as his sisters we were initially encouraged only to be told we were not a match - how could it be?  

As I look back I there were many things that I could have done differently, and we can't beat ourselves up as we did what we could at the time, I didn't want to deal with the possibility that he wouldn't pull through and hid behind caring for my mother.  The guilt creeps in, the 'would haves', 'should haves', and 'didn't do enough' start to ridicule you for being less than you thought you were.  But you have to make room for action, we will not accept ill health and disease as our fate and fight to find remedies, cures and prevention measures.

Death will come to us all, and we don't want to face it with any regrets.  So now that you have time on your side, be it a day, a week, month or even a year, make the most of it!

I share some of the journey of the time we held on to hope that things would be alright and he would stay with us in the following posts:

Prayer

Update

Understanding

In the Memories of Home posts I share memories of growing up that I shared with my brother and sister.

Memories of Home

What you can do?

Where ever you are in the world YOU CAN make a difference, find your local organisation and support their work.  

Here in Barbados one of the organisations we have is The Myeloma Lymphoma & Leukaemia Foundation of Barbados you can support by becoming a member $25 and support the events and initiatives that they put on.  We attended their Annual Tea Party, they have a number of acts performing, and it is a lovely event, a lot of work goes into organizing it.

Tea Party, always well attended!

Tea Party Dance Troupe

Co-Founder/President - Hyacinth Grimes

Tea Party Young Steel Pan Band, excellent!

They also do a lot of much needed fund raising as well at different events, malls etc, sharing information about the disease and help available.  So many people who are diagnosed in Barbados face very high medical bills, and are unable to afford some of the treatment that may readily be available in the UK or US.

Information available at their stall in Sky Mall

Member - Daphne Springer sharing her knowledge of blood cancers in Barbados

Contact the The Myeloma Lymphoma & Leukaemia Foundation of Barbados at:

• Mailing address is P.O. Box 235, Bridgetown, Barbados, or Pine Medical Centre, 3rd Avenue, Belleville, St. Michael, Barbados.
• Office phone number is (246) 435-3990.
• General email address is: mllf.org@caribsurf.com

As an artist I will be creating a set of 3 Prints and Cards that you can purchase and 30% of the cost will be donated to the organisation.  I will tell you more in another post over the next few weeks.

Why not think of ways that you can donate or raise funds and do your part.

Donation

We also have a fund raising page in Roberts memory which is supporting Myeloma UK, and Cancer Research please help raise funds for more research, if we all do our bit we can one day find cures to prevent others from loosing their loved ones.

Give Blood/Bone Marrow

Become a bone marrow donor

Give Blood - If you have had a blood transfusion prior to 1995 you will not be able to give blood see HERE

Check out the following Organsiations

IF YOU WISH TO REGISTER AS A POTENTIAL BONE MARROW, BLOOD OR ORGAN DONOR VISIT: 

ACLT Office - Tel no. 020 8240 4480, 7A Rathbone Square, Tanfield Road, Croydon, CR0 4HA  Please call ACLT office to book a 30 minute appointment. 

NATIONAL BLOOD SERVICE; BLOOD DONATION CENTRES Tel 0300 123 2323

Anthony Nolan Register Tel no. 0303 303 0303, You must be aged between 16 and 30 and generally healthy

DKMS - DELETE BLOOD CANCER Tel no. 020 8735 4230To everyone over 30 who can't join the Anthony Nolan bone marrow register. You can now join via DKMS ‘Delete Blood Cancer' Please CLICK HERE They will register potential bone marrow donors from 17 to 55 years. You must weigh over 7st 12Ibs in weight

Robert, see, your memory lives on in our hearts through your children, family and friends!  So too all those who remember family members and friends who have died from Cancer.

What ever you can do is appreciated, do it today, don't wait, don't put it off, think creatively how you may be able to support, it could be money, time, skill, bake sale, car wash, art classes - we can do it together!  

Stay blessed and be a blessing.

Word for the Week - Psalm 27:4

Dedicated to my wonderful, brave, encouraging, loving Brother Robert, who was also a husband, son, father, uncle, friend, supporter, who was  all the things you could ever want in a brother and then some! Who is truly in the House of the Lord, who sought him and is gazing upon his beauty......

Showing Sekani, Jorrell and Symphonie some moves!

Show your support HERE

One thing I ask of the LORD, this is what I seek: that I may dwell in the house of the LORD all the days of my life, to gaze upon the beauty of the LORD and to seek him in his temple. Psalm 27:4

Strength - Creating in Faith

Creating in Faith - Strength

Physical strength is something that we all possess to varying degrees and we can build upon it through training and exercise.  Inner strength is something far different built up from the trials we have been through and calls on reserves from a place that at times can be tested to the limit, and we can find ourselves wondering if we can make it through, whatever the situation, ready to throw in the towel one minute to the next being able to see some rays of sunshine and hope.

I have had my inner strength tested to varying degrees over the past 15 years and seen the strength of others tested in different ways.  Having looked after my mother and shared her journey on my blog, there have been moments where I wasn't sure if I could cope, or if I wanted to carry on.  In April early this year she suffered from a mini stroke and then another one in July while we were away on holiday.  As she ventures on the road to some form of recovery I am thankful that she is still here.  

We have shared our joy, laughter and pain as we venture into still unknown dementia territory, as her main carer I try and find things that will make her life more comfortable and look at ways to make her environment safe.  At the moment she has trouble walking, and her vision is very poor, so we have to look at alternative accommodation and preempt things that may arise and try and make her remaining years as comfortable as possible. 

In March 2011, Barbara my fellow artist and best friend of over 30 years passed away suddenly, no warning, no sickness, nothing leaving behind a husband and 5 children.  Our worlds were turned upside down.  I admired the strength that her husband showed, whilst in his pain he was there for everyone else, always asking how you were, giving you encouragement or seeing if there was anything he could do for you.  He pulled the family together, he had to, he was tested in the fire, there were some very dark times and it seemed inconceivable that he would ever see a glimmer of light, but on 4^th October this year 2 ½ years after Barbara’s death he met someone that showed him how to laugh again and they celebrated their wedding along with family and friends.

On 2^nd June this year, my brother passed after fighting multiple myeloma for 4 years, I am still trying to be strong calling on the experiences that I have been through, it doesn't feel like he is gone sometimes, I sometimes shaking my head in disbelief that this could have happened.  I look at the strength that Frances his wife has to call on to be there for their 3 children, to carry on doing the routines that used to be shared.  I wonder how I would have coped, with every corner a reminder of the loss. 

I was at the hospital right before he went to be with the Lord, not ever imagining that it could ever happen, hoping that it was a nightmare or to be able to flick the switch and change the channel.  Robert had said to me in 1992 when my father passed away that we had to be strong for my mother and we were.  Through my tears on the 2^nd June I knew that I had to find the strength, I was not alone in my grief and as we shared our memories and experiences our pain was and will be eased.

God says that he will never leave or forsake us, and that we can do all things through Him who gives us strength and I must say that despite the past few years my strength has truly come from God.  There is nothing that we can do on our own; we know others who have suffered things that we don’t even want to contemplate.  I talk to my son talk about Robert and the times we shared as children and growing up.  I also tell him about all those who risked their lives, fought and died so that he could be free and in his soon to be 18^th years allowed to vote and to be able to enjoy a life where his views and thoughts can make a difference – the generation of tomorrow.

Whatever you are going through remember that you are not on your own.  There are others who are praying for you, reaching out to you, lifting you up, and hearing your story, hearing your voice.  You will see that you are not on the journey alone, for in our strength we will begin to breathe again one day at a time.

Aim for perfection, listen to my appeal, be of one mind, live in peace.  And the God of love and peace will be with you... 2 Corinthians 13:11

Heaven and earth shall pass away, but My words shall not pass away... Matthew 24:35

Prayer - Creating in Faith

It is quite apt that my word for the Creating in Faith series that I have been doing on a weekly basis is Prayer. Prayer for me this week has been at the very heart of everything I have been doing.  Many of you know that I have been sharing about my brother Robert who was diagnosed with Multiple Myeloma in 2009.  Recently the doctors had said that his cancer wasn't responding to treatment, it was all over his body and was now roaming free throughout his blood.  He went into hospital last Sunday and has been there ever since, he became semi unconscious  and wasn't responding even to his name, he was having problems breathing and as a result his mouth and tongue has become extremely dry, the Doctors said he only had a few days, and we were very fearful and sad at their prognosis and what the outcome would be.

All I have been able to lean on is prayer.  The word of God is my foundation, and the only thing with whom I can put my trust.  I know that miracles happen every day, our very lives are miracles and its something that we often take for granted.  We don't often see the preciousness of our existence, the treasures that we each have locked away and we often miss the most important things that matter in our lives. All we have been able to do is pray - the bible tells us to 'pray without ceasing'.  We have been pressing in, people all around the world have been standing with us in prayer, for healing, transformation, strength to get through what has been a very difficult time.

Yesterday Robert woke out of the semi-consciousness and was able to acknowledge is wife and family, we chatted and asked him questions and he was able to respond.  We were encouraged by these small steps and every day we look for more improvements to take place in his blood levels and general strength.  We are staying with him round the clock encouraging him, to lift up his spirits and to let him know that he is not alone.  I want to encourage anyone out there who is going through a challenging time either through their own health or that of a loved one that this world is bigger than we can ever imagine and we can't rely on ourselves, our thoughts or what others feel our situation is saying regardless of the 'professional status'.

Prayer really changes things - situations, circumstances and relationships and my sole purpose is to pray until something happens. I know God is changing me as I press in, as I stand on his word and as I pray for and with my brother, we all have something that we are going through and I even have room enough to pray for you.  If you have a situation that you are dealing with I would love to stand with you in prayer, email me at amanda(at)realityarts(dot)co(dot)uk.

I will keep you updated, for those who are praying for the family we ask that you continue to lift him, his wife and the children up.  We are taking one day at a time, making the most of the miracles we see today and let tomorrow take care of itself.  For now stay blessed and have a good week.

For He will give His angels charge concerning you, to guard you in all your ways...Psalm 91:11

Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it and it will be yours..Mark 11:24

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God...Philippians 4:6

U is for Update

Since I wrote asking everyone to pray for my brother in my post called Understanding, who has Multiple Myeloma a couple of months ago I thought It would be helpful to give you an update.  Your prayers and thoughts for the family are still needed, and I appreciate all the comments that have been coming through and encouraging words.

Robert found out a couple of weeks ago that the cancer had spread all over his body, he was not responding to the previous chemo and they have since put him on another drug.  He found this last drug helped with his energy levels and he was (up to last week) feeling more like himself.  As part of the treatment he has to have a week off and during these weeks finds that he is extremely tired, and obviously some of the side effects are beginning to take its toll.  He has been having some trouble with his left side and nerve damage and there is a lot of weakness in his left hand.

As his big sister, even at our age I guess I still want to make things better for him as my younger brother, and feel so powerless at not being able to make it go away.  I also recently found out that I was not a match.  We shared so many adventures and fun times when we were children, and there are many more adventures I hope to share with him.  

More than 1 in 3 of us will get cancer, and those not affected directly will know someone who has it or know someone who has a loved one who is effected and it is up to us to take a stand and do what we can to raise awareness, funds, and do our part.  Cancer Research UK are running over 230 Race for Life events over the UK and Macmillan Cancer Research are also running a range of different events to raise awareness and much needed funds. I encourage you to do your part however you can where ever you are.  I also thank you in advance for your much needed prayers for Robert and the rest of the family.  Blessings, Amanda

Painting for the day

Each day I will show a completed piece of art or journal page hope you enjoy today's

 

Art Journal Page

 

 Blog Love

I am sharing some love with those who are also taking part in the challenge, it's not everyone whose blog starts with the letter U, but a few of them for you to start with....

 Uber Random

Unconventional Librarian

Under the Tiki Hut

Unless I write it down

Under the Trolls Bridge

Creating in Faith - Understanding (Special Request)

Good fortune can fall on the just and the unjust in equal measure, we know not when or where disaster will strike.

This week my brother was rushed to hospital, they had found elevated levels of calcium in his blood, he hadn't eaten for 3 days and was very weak.  The doctors did their tests, scans, mri's and  have come to the conclusion that multiple myeloma is back.  After his bone marrow transfusion, chemo and radio therapy last year we thought there would be at least a 10 year gap before we would have to worry about it, unfortunately the reports say no.

I tried  to understanding why 'our family'.  Why mum with dementia, Robert with this cancer and my father passing 20 years ago with an unknown illness.  There seems to be so many that have been struck down, we seem to be in a generation now where our parents were when we were younger when we can count the passing of friends and relatives that we know being affected by some illness or the other.

After getting the news I felt washed out, what words of encouragement could I offer to him when all I wanted to do was cry, as I sat thinking the words that came to me were, ‘....the effective fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much’ James 5:16.   It was then that I understood what I needed to do.  My tears cannot bring a cure but prayer can.  Despite it all we have to stand firm on the word of God.  There can be no compromises, no excuses, though at times our faith can be shaken by the very circumstances, I have found a renewed strength in the word.

I am not one who normally likes to ask for help, but the word says...were two or three come together ... I know that there will be strength in our prayers as we come together.  I ask you now to join with me in prayer for a miraculous healing for my brother Robert, and for his family, 3 children and wife.   We have to stand on the word of God, have faith and believe that we have the victory over defeat.  I would thank you in advance for taking the step for I know that God is working in all our lives and as we continue to move in faith,  a change will come and we will be blessed beyond our wildest dreams. 

As you go about your week, along with prayer ask God to enable you to understand the impact that your very gifts which you sometimes hide can, if nurtured, be a blessing.  Create a journal page or piece of art that expresses this.

Therefore I remind you to stir up the gifts of God which is in you through the laying on of my hands. For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind 2 Timothy 1:6-7

If you would like to see how I made the book mark pockets check out the post Bookmark Pockets

Come join the group - Creating in Faith, show us how you will be incorporating the words and scriptures and reflections in your art this week.  Step out and be a blessing and you will also be blessed!