Showing posts with label Purpose. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Purpose. Show all posts

Monday 25 March 2019

Podcast Episode 65 - Creating in Faith - Loss and Purpose

Come and join me on the podcast.

In today's episode I talk about loss and purpose. What do we do with the feelings of the loss of a loved one. When does the weeping turn to joy and how can we walk through the pain into the blessings of their memories.




There are so many of us who feel that if we don't think about the person then we won't feel the pain of loosing them but the opposite is true, we will try and numb the pain but we will still feel it, coming in waves when something reminds us of them, and it could be the smallest random thing that sparks it off.

I found that the more I thought about all the things that we did together, and laughed at those moments it helped me wade through the pain.  The more I did it I found that when I did think about them I would think back to joyous times, the times we shared and the things that they would have wanted to be remembered for.  One of the saddest things we can do is to decide not to think about the person as if they never existed because we cannot bear the pain, without realizing that when we do journey through instead of covering up we will have some amazing stories of strength, love and compassion, our memories of our loved ones will intensify without the pain, and we will be able to find laughter at those times we shared.

You are not alone

I will always miss the physical presence of the person but the feeling of their spiritual presence as if they were in the room sharing the moments that I am going through fills me with comfort.  

If you are going through the loss of a loved one, take your time, it is a gradual process and I am here if you want to share.  If you are able to journal or do something in your art journal you will also find comfort in creativity.  Don't shut yourself away but reach out and as you are blessed be a blessing to another.




Sunday 22 September 2013

How does your Garden grow? - Creating in Faith


Cordyline Australis - Palm like tree!

For close to 16 years I have been working on my garden which turned it from just a patch of grass with a fence either side, to an established space that can whisk you (in your mind) to far off destinations – if you use your imagination.  My garden also reflects the amount of work that has been lovingly put into it over the years and is full of palm trees, scented flowers, evergreens and a plum tree.  I wouldn’t say that I am an expert, but over the years I have gained much knowledge in how to look after  plants to get the best out of them. My garden is about  40% brought  as small plants 20% from seeds and 10% as gifts from the birds and 30% grown from cuttings I have received from family and friends.
We need balance in our lives


We grew up in an apartment/flat as children and my mother had many houseplants dotted around the house that she would tend to.  I would see her lovingly water and clean the plants on a daily basis and this action promoted their growth and in turn she would then propagate the plants.  I was always amazed that from one plant many generations could flourish.  When I moved out of my parents and into my own flat mum would give me plants that she had been growing and I in turn developed a love for plants, and went out and got my own.   I was amazed at how the right conditions could make a big difference to a plant that grew and blossomed to one that failed to thrive and died.  Back in those days the houseplants of choice were the Swiss cheese plant, the Rubber plant and the Spider plant which are all easy enough to look after yet give some spectacular results.


Graduating to a Garden


When I started a family of my own I was faced with a 100 foot garden, Sekani who was then just 2 years and determined to be my helper and my houseplant experience to lean on.  I was overwhelmed at first with the size and the job at hand but knew that if I had a plan of what I wanted, read up about how to go about it, I could make the garden become what I wanted over time. Some of the main things I wanted in the garden was colour, scent, birds and trees and a way to provide privacy from the neighbours each side.  Once I knew what I wanted shaping the garden to how I wanted it to look became the adventure and I was always up for the challenge of trying something new. 

Tools for the job

Each year of tending to the garden brought different challenges and blessings.  My very first plants that I grew from seed were sunflowers.  These plants are the most gratifying and a very easy to grow. With their big heads of flowers I was able to grow 9 foot specimens, and provided much food in the winter months for the visiting birds. I experimented over the years with different plant combinations, learnt to understand the soil and what was necessary to promote growth.  I decided quite early on that I didn’t want to have one of those gardens where you had to bring plants in for the winter months or dig up bulbs, but that whatever the season with the right care the plants were able to handle themselves despite the elements.  
Scented roses at the back of the garden
 

I have shared in posts on my blog the many presents the birds have brought in the form of seeds that turned into a wide variety of flowering plants and trees, and I have either allowed them to grow where they have fallen or relocated them to a more suitable place within the garden


Putting your back into it!


I find being in the garden to be a really relaxing experience, but you have to work hard to get it to where you want it to be so that you can enjoy it.  I find maintaining  the garden an enjoyable experience,  many a time I come out it is to either relocate, plant or take a cutting, some much needed weeding and general tidying up, or just to sit with a book and enjoy the sound of the birds.  
Down side of the Cordyline  - it sheds its leaves

The weeds and fallen leaves are something that are always going to be there so you need to make sure you keep on top of them and put things in place to make it easier on yourself.  For me the weeds are a natural part of the cycle and there comes a time in our lives when we have to look at what we are doing that really doesn’t add anything to our lives, but instead like the weeds choke progress and development.  We have to work hard for our dreams, spending time on a regular basis to see them come to pass.  The soil also needs to be nourished and you have to take notice of those times when a plant needs that extra special boost.

plants now established

As I talk about my time spent in the garden, I realise that I have to remind myself to spend time ‘looking after’ myself. As the winter approaches we loose the sunlight and the much needed vitamin D production that would normally take place and so we need to ensure that our bodies are in tip top form and have all the nourishment that it needs.   In the same way that I would have a clear out of the garden, looking to see which weeds were trying to find a home amongst the plants I need to spend time in my own life seeing what activities I am involved with or practises that need to be stopped because they are not adding any benefits to my overall health and well being.   

Fruitful

Plum tree bearing fruit each year
 
We have to make sure we are doing those things that will enable us to be fruitful in all that we do.  The bible tells us that God is the vine and we are the branches and every now and then we have to prune that which is not being productive or bearing fruit.  We can all think of activities that are a waste our time and an ineffective use of our time, so what are you going to do about it?  Take time this week to think about not only what jobs need to be done in the garden, but what maintenance jobs you can do in your own life to get things ready for the autumn and winter months and stay blessed!

I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener.  John 15:1

..He giveth to all life, and breath, and all things...Acts 17:25

Saturday 22 December 2012

Creating in Faith - Loss and purpose


At some point in your life you will experience loss.
 
I have been finding in my 40’s that there is an increase in people I know who have either passed or have illnesses with very serious prognosis.  You never imaging yourself to be in that position, can’t prepare for it and when it comes it leaves a hole that seems impossible to fill.   

Almost 20 years after my father passed I still have dreams about him in totally new situations. In the beginning the dreams would be of him during his illness.  As the dreams progressed he would get stronger until one dream he was lifting a wardrobe and I asked him if he could be more careful because of the illness, he laughed and told me he was fine.  In my most recent dream he came to my mum’s home and had a friend with him.  He was dressed really smart and looked like the picture I have of him in his younger days.  
 On waking I realised the friend he had with him was my mum when she was a young woman. 
The loss of a loved one takes time to come to terms with, the intense pain softens, you carry on, but you never forget.  I still think about my first son who passed at 3 days old, he would have been 23 now and I often wonder what he would have been doing now, thinking about all that he could have achieved with his life.  

While we can’t bring back those we have lost we can celebrate their lives, we rejoice at the lives they touched the impact they had on this world and we look to our own lives and hope that we too can make an impact on the lives of others and be the blessing we were called to be.   

I imagined as I got older I would be sharing more times of laughter with tales of grandchildren and aching joints, alongside the creative adventures with my good friend Barbara who I had known since I was 16 and who passed in 2011 and is so dearly missed.  
 From time to time I dwell on the shared experiences, and conversations we had about our journey as artists, the love she gave to her family and the love she shared with others.
 me and Barbara in our early 20's

Ecclesiastes tells us that there is a time for everything and everything in its season


There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens:
a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot, 
a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.

As we draw close to the end of the year, let us make a decision to live our lives on purpose.  Take hold of 2013 and aim to make an impact on your own life and that of others.  Whilst we will continue over the years at some point to suffer loss, let us hold on to the blessings that each individual life shared with us and celebrate their memories with joy, and let us live our lives to the full and not take one more day for granted.

  He gives strength to the weary, and to him who lacks might He increases power...Isaiah 40:29



Come join the group - Creating in Faith, show us how you will be incorporating the words and scriptures and reflections in your art this week.  Step out and be a blessing and you will also be blessed!

Tuesday 17 April 2012

P is for Purpose


We often wonder what our purpose is and want our lives to have meaning.  I never once imagined that I would be a carer, having to make the decisions for my mums life and dealing with the responsibility.

I have always been an organised person, loving lists and order.  I love organising the lives of others and my previous job as an Executive PA addressed the need for these skills in making sure my boss was where he needed to be at the right time or the conference went smoothly.

I saw the skills transferring to my own business when I was made redundant.  What I also had to do was transfer the skills I used in all my jobs and refit them making them fit for purpose as a carer and constantly remind myself how far I have come.  As we gather new experiences to deal with the tasks at hand we are equiped with additional skills for the next challenge that will come.

What challenges have you faced and found you were able to deal with when you really got down to it?


Words so far....

A is for Alzheimer’s, B is for Behaviour, C is for Carer, D is for Dependant, E is for Enough, F is for Fear, G is for Guilt, H is for Health Professionals, I is forIdentity, J is for Judgement K is for Knowledge, L is for Love,  M is for Motherhood, N is for Neighbourhood, O is for Opportunities 

These posts are part of the A-Z Challenge taking place during the month of April.  I have been sharing about my experience as a carer to a mother with Dementia.  If you would like to know more join the Arts in Health Network and also check out my website for information on some of the work I have done with Creativity and Dementia.
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